Friday, December 17, 2010

birdie gets a scare

I'm updating from my phone again. I'm too lazy and it's too painful to walk up the stairs into the office to use the computer. what else is new? I wish the mac book was here.
only 11 days left until little miss Miette Aleksi will be cut out of me. haha sorry to put it that way, I'm in a bit of a moronic mood. I have to say, I am petrified. not of the actual surgery, but of not being able to move my legs and being numb below the chest. I don't know why that scares me so much. is that odd? probably. everyone is telling me it won't bother me, but I can totally see myself having a full blown panic attack as soon as I lose feeling. I swear, panic disorder will be the death of me.
I would much rather be having this c-section than be in labor for hours on end.  that seriously could give me a panic attack just thinking about it too much. so weird that I would rather endure a surgery and harder recovery, but hey that's me.
I just can't wait to see that little face of hers and fall in love like never before.
mad cheese.

1 comment:

  1. I was terrified about the numbness too! I was especially petrified when I was told I might get the sensation of not being able to breathe...what?! Honestly, I freaked until the spinal kicked in, then it was like that feeling where you are waking up from a deep sleep all is still kind of dreamy. I just kept telling myself that I wasn't going to die from lack of oxygen (they put oxygen on you) and it was over before I knew it. The feeling of seeing your baby for the first time completely overpowers the rest!
    Just thought I might be able to help your anxiety a bit, since I remember that fear.